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Do You Need Us?

When is it time to ask for help? The questionnaire below can help you find out. If you or a loved one struggles with sexual sin, infidelity or is reeling from the devastation of an affair, this simple exercise will help clarify needs and issues. It's the first step toward healing, hope and restoration.

  • Do you find that you are powerless to stop your compulsive sexual behavior, even if you are in danger of being caught, or no matter how many times you promise yourself that you will never do it again?
  • Is your career, family, spiritual development, or personal life being neglected in any way due to the time you devote to your sexual habits?
  • Is part of your sexual life kept secret from your spouse and others who love you, or do you live a hidden sexual life that is at variance with how others see you?
  • Have you ever engaged in or been arrested for illegal sexual activities such as exposure, viewing child pornography, soliciting prostitutes, or looking in people's windows, and do you persist in such activities despite the risk?
  • Do you have a pattern of getting involved in negative, destructive, or even dangerous relationships or sexual encounters?
  • Are you overwhelmed by a sense of shame every time you have sex or do you find that you want to disengage from your partner (marital or otherwise) as quickly as possible after engaging in sexual activity?
  • Do you find that you must continually increase the level of your sexual behavior to get the same high or feeling of satisfaction?
  • Are you spending significant portions of your day fantasizing about sex or trying to seek out stimulating materials or experiences?
  • Does your sexual behavior leave you feeling empty, guilty, or self-loathing afterwards?
  • Do you have shameful feelings about your body and do you tend to look upon the bodies of people to whom you are attracted as objects?
  • Is there a pattern or ritual in which you engage prior to your sexual activities?
  • Were you ever the victim of sexual abuse or assault at any time in your life?
  • Are you terrified of being caught for persistent sexual activity in which you are engaged, or do you constantly have to cover your tracks?
  • Has there ever been an element of violence, domination, or coercion in your sexual practices, whether you initiated it or not?
  • Does your sexual activity or fantasy life include objects, fetishes, situations, people, or anything that you would at times not consider an acceptable part of your sexual tastes and expression?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you may be a sexual addict. We encourage you to explore our materials or contact us for more information or assistance. If you had to spend time thinking about your response to any of the self-test items, you also may benefit from getting more information from us.

Sexual Addiction Checklist developed by John Mark Haney, Ph.D. © 2003, The Affair Recovery Center