First Steps Bootcamp for Surviving Infidelity

Learn the fundamentals of healing after infidelity. This free bootcamp is a primer for participating in our comprehensive online courses or weekend retreats.

Schedule
Day 1
The Path of Recovery

Day 2
Ambivalence & Pain Management

Day 3
Recovery Timeline

Day 4
Safety & Managing Anger

Day 5
Advice on Discovery

Day 6
Protecting Your Children

Day 7
What To Do Next

About the Online Bootcamp

 Cost: free
Length: 7 days
Complete solo or with your spouse


Navigating your way through the chaos of infidelity is much like swimming underwater in the dark. You want to breathe but don’t know if you’re going up or down, making progress or drowning. We’ve been there ourselves and have treated thousands of couples with similar struggles, so we’re very familiar with the challenges you face. More importantly, we can show you the necessary steps for finding your way back to the surface. The First Steps Bootcamp gives you the first of many steps to kick start your journey.

The goal of the First Steps Bootcamp is simply to show you what recovery takes. We’ll give you step by step, practical guides each day so you’ll know where you’re headed.

Bootcamp Format

On each of the seven days, you will have 3-5 goals to complete for that day. Each goal features reading and exercise questions or activities to help you achieve that goal. There are questions for both individuals and couples, depending on if your spouse is participating with you. The Bootcamp is accessible by computer and your mobile phone.

Schedule of Daily Goals

Day 1
The Path of Recovery

  1. The Story of ‘Us’
  2. Marriage Perspective
  3. Betrayed Perspective
  4. Unfaithful Perspective
  5. Recovery Obstacles

Day 2
Ambivalence & Pain Management

  1. Addressing Ambivalence
  2. Reasons for Staying
  3. Stages of Pain
  4. Pain Management

Day 3
Recovery Timeline

  1. Realistic Timeline
  2. Healthy Recovery
  3. The Recovery Process
  4. Mentor Video

Day 4
Safety & Managing Anger

  1. Commit to Safety
  2. Create Safety
  3. Destructive Cycles
  4. Who to Tell
  5. When to Manage Anger
  6. Taking a Time-Out

Day 5
Advice on Discovery

  1. Discovery
  2. Why Disclose?
  3. The Right Information
  4. Get Through Discovery
  5. Safety Guidelines

Day 6
Protecting Your Children

  1. How We Told Our Kids
  2. How to tell the kids
  3. Most Common Mistakes

Day 7
What To Do Next

  1. Why Groups?
  2. I Wish I’d Known
  3. Now What?

FAQ

Does free really mean free?
Absolutely! There is no commitment. All you need to sign up is an email address. The content is copyrighted by Affair Recovery.

What resources will I need for the Bootcamp?
All you need is an internet connection.

How long does each day take?
The amount of time spent each day depends on several variables including how quickly you read, how deeply you answer the questions, and whether or not your spouse is participating. The questions are formed in a way that allows you to choose the depth of your answer. The deeper you go, the greater the benefit, although it will require more time.

Seven days is great, but then what? What do I do when I complete the Bootcamp?
Don’t worry; we’re not going to just abandon you after the seven days. On Day 7 of the Bootcamp we’ll walk you through what your next steps look like. You’ll have a few choices available and then it’s up to you. For recovery to work for you, you have to work for recovery. We’ll light the path but it’s up to you to take it.

What if it takes me longer than 7 days to complete the Bootcamp?
The Bootcamp is not going anywhere, so feel free to start whenever you'd like and complete the material at your own pace. We recommend 7 days, but it's certainly not the only option.


What are others saying about the Bootcamp?
"...My wife was sure she would never be able to move on after my affair especially during the first 2 months after D-Day. My D-Day was 14 months ago and this has been the hardest time of my life. The fear of losing my family was and is overwhelming. I found AR and started reading and watching videos but my wife did not want to read or get help. She was sure we would be getting divorced. I persevered and continued to read books and use the AR site and put into action everything I learned. She finally agreed to do the 7-Day Boot Camp. We later attended EMS Weekend which gave both of us incredible hope but recovery takes a long time. We are now 2 months past our D-Day 1 year anniversary and things have improved so much I cannot even believe it myself." - D, NY


"My wife found Affair Recovery’s 7 Day Bootcamp online about 15 days after I revealed my affair to her. I had moved out of the house, and she had filed for divorce. We were definitely at our darkest hour. Even though she could barely stand being in the same room with me, and I was wracked by guilt and shame, we found the structure and honesty of the bootcamp to be just what we needed to begin to communicate. We started reading the exercises aloud to one another, and watching Affair Recovery videos together. When we finished the bootcamp, we signed up for EMSO....
... I am now back living at home, and we have agreed to reconcile. We still have a long way to go, but we are already enjoying a better marriage than we could have ever imagined. In the EMSO program, we were able to witness the process working for other couples as well. My wife, in particular, is very averse to counseling and group therapy, but she engaged herself quickly in the process, and quickly expressed her enthusiasm and gratitude for the program.
I would highly recommend giving this a try. It continues to work for us!" - D | TX