You are lucky that your husband is understanding. It has been 9 months since D day for me and we went to the EMS class in Nov last year. We have also continued counseling which has helped us with communication and I can see both of us growing and becoming more spiritual. But the triggers keep coming and they hurt so much, just as if it happened yesterday. Two days ago we were at the beach in the bahamas and I was really strugeling. He tried to be reassuring but I couldn't get past it quickly enough for him. I cried and he did not comfort me. It is so painful when he can't show me any compassion. He got frustrated and walked away. I stayed there crying which he now says he didn't know I was crying.
How can someone show you no compassion when you need it the most? How can someone hold a grudge against you when you can't get past the pain? I'm here trying to find forgiveness and I'm sorry that the reminders make it uncomfortable for him but I need him to help me get through this don't I? I suppose not. I can choose to not depend on him and just focus on me right. Trust in god, but why do I keep crying and keep thinking of them together??? We were away on a beautiful beach and she was still there in my head when I recalled he was planning a beach vacation with her just one year ago. He had no issues reassuring her of his "love" to her when he was on vacation with me telling her he would miss her and couldn't wait for their trip.
Hopeless
You are lucky that your husband is understanding. It has been 9 months since D day for me and we went to the EMS class in Nov last year. We have also continued counseling which has helped us with communication and I can see both of us growing and becoming more spiritual. But the triggers keep coming and they hurt so much, just as if it happened yesterday. Two days ago we were at the beach in the bahamas and I was really strugeling. He tried to be reassuring but I couldn't get past it quickly enough for him. I cried and he did not comfort me. It is so painful when he can't show me any compassion. He got frustrated and walked away. I stayed there crying which he now says he didn't know I was crying.
How can someone show you no compassion when you need it the most? How can someone hold a grudge against you when you can't get past the pain? I'm here trying to find forgiveness and I'm sorry that the reminders make it uncomfortable for him but I need him to help me get through this don't I? I suppose not. I can choose to not depend on him and just focus on me right. Trust in god, but why do I keep crying and keep thinking of them together??? We were away on a beautiful beach and she was still there in my head when I recalled he was planning a beach vacation with her just one year ago. He had no issues reassuring her of his "love" to her when he was on vacation with me telling her he would miss her and couldn't wait for their trip.
Feeling Hopeless Today