This timeline is helpful until you have done the work for 20 months, felt that you were ready to commit to the marriage again, finally reached forgiveness, and then you have a series of new revelations about your spouse's affairs come to light. You find out he has been lying to you about the depth and scope of his affairs not only for the past 20 months in his most recent affair, but for the past 18 years in a previous affair. So back to the beginning I go! I am shattered again, only more so because, if the truth had been told at the beginning, we would well be on our way through recovery or maybe even completely healed and reconciled by now. Now I have to begin again and try to figure out who this person is that I married, grieve the new revelations, deal with the re-shattered trust, and see if I can get past the selfishness that he demonstrated for lying at the beginning. He watched me hurt for those months and never seemed to care. This may take way longer than the 18-24 months on this timeline. I don't know if I can make it through the process again. I am so very weary of it all. So, so sad.
Starting over
This timeline is helpful until you have done the work for 20 months, felt that you were ready to commit to the marriage again, finally reached forgiveness, and then you have a series of new revelations about your spouse's affairs come to light. You find out he has been lying to you about the depth and scope of his affairs not only for the past 20 months in his most recent affair, but for the past 18 years in a previous affair. So back to the beginning I go! I am shattered again, only more so because, if the truth had been told at the beginning, we would well be on our way through recovery or maybe even completely healed and reconciled by now. Now I have to begin again and try to figure out who this person is that I married, grieve the new revelations, deal with the re-shattered trust, and see if I can get past the selfishness that he demonstrated for lying at the beginning. He watched me hurt for those months and never seemed to care. This may take way longer than the 18-24 months on this timeline. I don't know if I can make it through the process again. I am so very weary of it all. So, so sad.