Thank you for your post. I too needed to know every last detail, many times over. Even though it was horrible, and even though my unfaithful husband needed to be asked questions in just the right way before he would be completely open, I needed to hear it. I didn't want to give his affair any more power than it had over me. I wanted to shine a bright light on the whole nasty thing. And unfortunately I too have a very vivid imagination, that made his affair seem like an amazing love story, but in reality it wasn't. I also asked the same question many times, not only to get it straight in my head, but also to see if the details changed. It is an awful thing to go through, but for me, it was like taking all of the snapshots of their time together and laying it out on the ground like a collage so I could see the whole picture (I'm grateful there were no actual photos). I will also say that my husband is still dealing with his own triggers, and is trying to still face some of those things head on. Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I wish you healing and happiness.
My imagination was worse
Thank you for your post. I too needed to know every last detail, many times over. Even though it was horrible, and even though my unfaithful husband needed to be asked questions in just the right way before he would be completely open, I needed to hear it. I didn't want to give his affair any more power than it had over me. I wanted to shine a bright light on the whole nasty thing. And unfortunately I too have a very vivid imagination, that made his affair seem like an amazing love story, but in reality it wasn't. I also asked the same question many times, not only to get it straight in my head, but also to see if the details changed. It is an awful thing to go through, but for me, it was like taking all of the snapshots of their time together and laying it out on the ground like a collage so I could see the whole picture (I'm grateful there were no actual photos). I will also say that my husband is still dealing with his own triggers, and is trying to still face some of those things head on. Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I wish you healing and happiness.