Setting boundaries during this time

It's been 54 days since I found out. I am the betrayed. My husband is ambivalent. He says he loves me, but he keeps running to her. I finally asked him to move out until he was committed to making the marriage work. I'm not sure what all that should look like. Do I have him over to see the kids or ask him to take them elsewhere? (I had him over last night and I'm a mess today). Do I let him come and go for showers and clothes (he is living in his shop)? I don't want to nitpick and be bitter and vengeful, but I don't know how to set the boundaries that are helpful to both of us and keeps him in the lives of his children. Thoughts?