Q&A How Can I Take Control of the Intrusive Thoughts?

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The images I’ve created in my mind of the scenes between my husband and the affair partner and picturing his body being shared with her haunt me. My husband and I are sexually active, and often but despite my love and feeling in that moment I still think of her majority of the time. I can’t even get through a sex scene in a movie without losing it. These triggers are killing me, any pointers on how I take control of my mind back?



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WOW! That hit the exact thoughts running through my mind. This is huge for me as well. The image of him kissing AP1 & AP 2 are particularly hurtful. Did he hold their face, was it as passionate? UGH! My body is so different from either AP and it has been a thorn in our sex life for over 2 years now. The intrusive thoughts are getting fewer, but man when they hit it is like a ton of bricks hit me in the gut. I feel nauseous, dizzy, and I am definitely just pretending normal after that thought. He is very willing to talk about it and reassure me but then he is left not feeling aroused due to the shame and guilt. I on the other hand love that he can hear me and we can talk about it and I am more than ready to reconnect. Any ideas for that one John?

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