Q&A How Can My Spouse Work with the Affair Partner and Still Be Okay?

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My husband had an affair with a coworker, physical and emotional. It started in August 2021 and he got caught in January 2022. We went to marriage counseling immediately, he broke it off but in February she walked into his office to check on him and asked if she could give him a hug. The affair continued and become even more intimate with meeting in hotels, travel, etc. I found this new discovery on Aug 30th 2022 and wonder if my spouse needs to leave his job. He is up for retirement in 3 years and works for the state so in order to get his retirement benefits needs to stay within the state for work. He is looking but right now there aren’t any jobs available that fit his qualifications and if any they are a huge cut in pay. Another thing about retiring within the state is your last 3 years of salary are the percentage you get for retirement so your goal is to make as much as you can during your last three years. I’m just nervous of them seeing each other and a relapse to happen again. They do e-mail on a regular basis for work questions and are in a couple of virtual weekly meetings. Currently my husband has been able to work remote but we feel like that privilege is coming to an end quickly and then he will see this woman in person again if he stays.



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