Q&A How Do We Get to the Truth?

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Question: 

My husband and I are in the EMS Online course. We are at Week 2, Tell the Story. I feel like he is trying to remember what he has already told me instead of what is true. How do I handle this? I have been lied to for 2 years and can't handle anymore.

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disclosure

My husband is in AA recovery from alcohol and cocaine addiction. He has been sober since the day I decided to try and forgive him after a 10 month+ affair where he left me for her and I was told by the neighbors not him about the affair. Every time we try and talk about the affair he brings up "because I was drunk and high" as his only excuse or reason why he did it. I am trying to put pressure on him to leave the addictions out of the affair recovery as the affair was also an addiction and this is what we need to stay on topic about. He gets frustrated and leaves the room or yells at me. I don't know what to do? I can't keep circling back to the "other" addictions when it's the affairs that caused all the deep heart damage to us. He says he want this marriage but I can see 9 months has passed with no disclosure. Only what I found out on my own or from others.