Q&A Shouldn't He Be Wooing Me Back?

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Question: 

Hi Rick, I'm 35, husband 36, lived together for 11 years, and married one year. After six months of marriage, I discovered my husband’s numerous one night stands beginning while dating me. Despite what I've learned in the all AR courses, which I'm so grateful for, I still feel overwhelmingly sad, angry and resentful all the time. I have zero respect or loving feelings for him. I could start over and have kids someday, with all new memories and no bad. But I'm afraid that I could end up with someone worse, or alone. It's a gamble. My husband needs to show me he is worth sticking around. I'm glad he's doing H4H and AA, but I don't see him putting in effort to win me back. He’s now sober and faithful, but no brownie points for being what a husband is supposed to be. Recovery work is not enough. He should be spending all his time winning me back with small and grand gestures. Showing up with flowers once a week doesn't cut it. I'd broadcast loving messages on a billboard in Times Square, if that's what it took. Shouldn't he be doing more? Shouldn't he be showing me that he will be an outstanding, model husband? Is all the pain worth sticking around? Should I end the marriage and start over? After this mess, I will not settle for average -- I want an awesome husband.

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