Q&A Should I Leave the Marriage or Should I Stay?

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Question: 

I discovered my husband's emotional affair more than three years ago. And he said they had had the affair for 6-9 months when I discovered it. My problem is the affair didn't end. It got to a stage where he told me that he wanted two wives. I an African (Zimbabwean) and polygamy is common in my culture. I am not comfortable with it though. My husband has refused help whatsoever. He said he doesn't want to listen to people's opinions on what he already knows. He told me a lot of hurting things. When I try to get answers from him he defends his AP and paints me as the bad one. He has never taken responsibility for his actions instead he has blamed me all the way. He actually blames me for all his failures in life. The problem is I love him. Am I crazy to love such a man whom I know is having an affair with someone else and is very selfish not to even consider how I feel? He actually told me that the woman is not going anywhere and I should just leave with it. He said she understands him better than I do. He has found someone to build his life with. I did most of the don’ts you spoke about. What should I do? How do I heal? How do I move on? Should I leave the marriage or should I stay? There are actually some friends and family supporting him in all this. Is there hope? Am I hanging on to a fantasy? Please help? Note we have been married for 16 years now and we have two children 15 & 9.

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