Q&A Am I Wrong to Feel Suspicious or Am I Jumping to Conclusions?

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My husband cheated 6 years ago and right after the affair partner broke it off she went down to his parents house to let them know she was pregnant with his child. By that time, I had already found out about the affair a few days prior and we were somewhat trying to work things out. He played it cool and would say she was mad and making stuff up. He told me that she had told him that she had a hysterectomy. The truth was he didn’t use any protection and I could see he was worried. Well as far as we know, nothing came of these claims. Ever since we have been through counseling, couples therapy and the EMS weekend course and we’ve had some progress. However, just recently I found out he’s been thinking about having a vasectomy. The last time we ever discussed this was about 8 years prior to the affair. I asked him if he would consider having one (since we both agreed we were done having children) but he said he would not ever have one, it wasn’t something he wanted to do. Now after the affair and this illegitimate child scare he suddenly wants to have one. I confronted him if this was the reason or was he just doing this to protect himself from making anyone else pregnant in the future. Of course he denied it. He knows I’m premenopausal, on birth control and almost 50, so I don’t believe it when he says it’s for me. I feel there is more to this than what he is saying. Am I wrong to feel suspicious or jumping to conclusions? Could he be thinking about having another affair? Why does he want this now? How can I get him to talk about this without making him close up?



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