Q&A Are We Losing Our Vigilance in Recovery?

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Dear Rick, My husband and I completed our EMS course two months ago. It has been 6 months since D-day, and for the most part things are going well in our relationship. You might even say things are normal most days. However, whenever I become triggered my husband gets frustrated and discouraged. He says he is just ready for it all to be over. I'm hurt that he is being dismissive of my feelings and I feel that he is rushing the recovery process, which we both know can take 18-24 months. During our EMS course he changed so much for the better and he truly put everything into saving our marriage and committed himself to recovery. But now it feels like he is just over it. He has started to bend the rules we set for his safety, like no alcohol on business trips. He says he has changed for the better, and he has. But he says he is ready to stop feeling ashamed and I'm worried that we are losing our vigilance.

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