Q&A How do I Stop Being Ambivalent so I can Commit Back to the Marriage?

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Question: 

Hi Rick, I am the unfaithful and I struggle with fluctuating feelings towards my mate and my relationship. I want to get off the ambivalence and move forward but there is a strong fear of commitment. My therapist is working with me on internal family systems and what has uncovered so far is that when I was a baby between birth and 2 to 3 years old, I stayed and was cared for by my nanny on weekdays while my parents brought me home on weekends as both my parents were working. Thus, I have somewhat recreated the scenario whereby I am torn between two mothers, as it is now between my mate and my AP or other attractive females. I struggle to settle for one mate and stay loyal and committed to one person, especially in my thought life. I remember growing up fantasizing about being "rescued" or "rescuing" girls I am attracted to as a teenager. Can you give me some advice that can help me get out of my pattern?

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