Q&A I Feel Stuck in My Mates Recovery. What Should I Do?

To watch the video please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
To watch the video, please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
Gain unlimited access to over 1,800 articles and expert Q&A videos.
Already a Recovery Library member? Log in to listen to the full recording.


I’ve been married for 13 years. 4 month ago, my wife started insisting we should go to counseling because her love for me had left and she needed change. After asking about details she eventually admitted, she had been kissing with her boss 3 times the past 6 months and they had feelings for each other. She said they had no future and she had chosen me. So she quit, insisting to go through the full resignation period though, but promised me all contact would stop thereafter. After her last day she went into a deep crisis. Suddenly she wasn’t sure she could love me again. Had no feelings for me. She’s in doubt about everything except that she love our daughters. She is pretty cold and distant towards me, shows no sign of remorse and clearly has no desire for me. The ‘no contact’ deal has been broken by ‘work related questions’. She has started getting professional help because she says, she needs to fix herself before she can think about us, but I feel trapped in her recovery process. I feel she is extremely selfish. Everything is about what she wants. I’m the betrayed part but I get very little consideration. She has all the power. Just waiting for her to make up her mind is awful and it drives me crazy. I love her very much! It is so hard to give her space and not desire her. What should I do?



RL_Media Type: 

What type of affair was it?

Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
Take the Affair Analyzer

Free Surviving Infidelity Bootcamp

Our experts designed this step-by-step guide to help you survive infidelity. Be intentional with your healing with this free 7-day bootcamp.
I would highly recommend giving this a try.
-D, Texas