Q&A Should I Be Okay with My Mates Ex-Spouse Staying in Our Home When Family Comes to Visit?

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Question: 

Should I be ok with my husbands ex-partner, who he has grandchildren with, staying in our home when bringing our grandson from another state, for a visit? We only get to see our grandkids when we travel to there homes that are out of state. My husband has had multiple affairs and recently confessed to a one night stand over 25 years ago with this ex-partner while married to me. I believe they have moved on but they have to have some relationship due to children and grandkids. Our grandsons mother can’t bring him and his father, my step son, passed away 5 years ago. We want to do what’s best for our 6 year old grandson, but I feel disrespected by he being ok with her staying at our house. Should I let her stay with us? Am I unreasonable? I feel this is the consequence to his bad choice.

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Should me and my husband let his ex-partner know that I’m aware

Hi Rick. My husband and the mother of his older children had a one night stand years ago while married to me. She and I have developed a cordial relationship through the years and have worked to build our blended family. However, my husband recently disclosed his old affair with her and I feel like she has this secret that I don’t know. Should I or we let her know of my knowledge of their one night stand because my husband and I have reached a place of sharing everything with each other to solidify our marriage. Also, I want her to know I forgive them and want to be able to work together for the sack of the children and grand children.