It's been almost 2 years since my husband first learned of my affair, though only 5 months since he got the full story. We used to have a very nice sex life, but he says he is very rarely able to enjoy it now, since there are always at least a few intrusive thoughts or images of me with my AP every time we are intimate. My question is: why? What purpose do you think it serves the betrayed spouse to have these? I don't mean he does it on purpose. Are these intrusive thoughts a protective function of the mind in some way? It is a shame for us both to not be able to connect this way as we used to.