I'm an unfaithful and a betrayed. My wife's affair was just discovered only a few months ago and mine was a year ago. We attended an EMS weekend and I am trying to reconnect with my wife. I feel ashamed for what I've done along with overwhelming grief and empathy for the pain that I caused her. However, she says she hates me and when I tell her nice things or the things I'm willing to do to make our relationship safe. She doesn't want to hear it. I've been proactive about my recovery and I want her to heal. She feels so depressed and I feel her pain daily. Will harboring for hope or hope for healing help us on our road to recovery and will it help us to reconnect?