Q&A Will This End?

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My wife had an affair this year. We have been married 14 years and I believe had a very great relationship. Her AP was a close family friend of ours that we have known for 10 years. I was very close friends with him. Her relationship with him was extremely emotionally entangled and physical. She is convinced that it was real love that they shared with each other. Their romantic relationship lasted 2.5 months, but they had been secretly friends for a year plus. We are 2.5 months into recovery. We are both taking Affair Recovery courses. She is grieving the loss of her AP. My question is in regards to her not seeing how wrong it all is. She has said that it wasn’t lust it was love. I don’t really care which it was, it was wrong... so wrong! We were married, in covenant marriage before God, committed to each other for life. Just because they “loved” each other doesn’t make it ok or better. I know she knows it was wrong. She has said she is sorry to me. But she never talks about how wrong it all was... But being in limerence and pretty ambivalent about us and it all, I don’t know if or when she will ever see how wrong it was. I’m so hurt by it all. My group leaders say it will take time. I’m just struggling so much living with my wife who doesn’t seem to really care what she did to break us and me. I have primarily only seen her cry over the loss of her AP. Will this end? She just finished week 5 of H4H. I just finished week 3 of HH.



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