Q&A Can Separation Increase the Time It Takes a Couple to Recover?

To watch the video please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
To watch the video, please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
Gain unlimited access to over 1,800 articles and expert Q&A videos.
Already a Recovery Library member? Log in to listen to the full recording.


I was very disconnected from him emotionally myself, very busy with a new baby with no family and friends local to help, as well as physically separated weeks at a time due to my unfaithful husband's job, when the yearlong affair took place. Now, 14 months later, I still do not feel like there is any romantic connection. We are still apart 95% of the time while he travels for work. When he comes home for a few days at a time, I get major anxiety and panic attacks (which don't happen while he is away). I don't really want him touching me sexually at all. Hugs can be tough, kisses (pecks at the end of the night before we head to separate bedrooms) are really anxiety ridden for me. We have "family time" and I am often triggered, angry and anxious. He bonds with our son, and then leaves again. He is doing work. He did lie about seeing her (just eye contact, she was furious and he felt bad- but he didn't tell me, I found out) so I feel like I can’t catch a break from this. I have promised to continue to the 18-24 month window but I wonder if it would be longer because we rarely see each other. I also wonder if I should at least be romantically attracted and not still just disgusted that he would disrespect me so much.



RL_Media Type: 

What type of affair was it?

Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
Take the Affair Analyzer

Free Surviving Infidelity Bootcamp

Our experts designed this step-by-step guide to help you survive infidelity. Be intentional with your healing with this free 7-day bootcamp.
I would highly recommend giving this a try.
-D, Texas