Q&A How Does Trickle Truth Affect my Recovery Timeline?

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Question: 

Rick,

I have a question regarding the recovery timeline. I know that a general guideline is 18-24 months but how is that impacted by trickle truth? My husband and I are 16 months post D-Day and are currently enrolled in EMS Online. My husband is finally committing to being truthful so more information has come to light in the last month. The most significant piece was how the affair really started. I have spent all of this time trying to understand his version of the story and it never made sense. The REAL explanation is so much easier to process and I wish I had that to work with from the beginning. He also denied many other things where the truth came out recently.

I am a person who likes to set goals and I know one of my jobs is to keep my eyes on the horizon. I want to set a timeline to work toward but I feel trickle truth (which has happened throughout) has really set me back. Six to twelve months post D-Day the story evolved to much more than he originally shared. I can give you many examples of significant areas that he's lied about all along. Each time, I had to regroup and start over.

So when does MY timeline begin? Is it D-Day or is it 3 weeks ago when I learned more? I'm hoping that trickle truth doesn't take me permanently back to square one because that would mean we just added another 16 months on to this hell. Can you give me an idea for a realistic goal to set for myself? I need something to believe in.

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