Q&A Is Time to Draw the Line in the Sand?

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D-day was 3 years ago. We have been on the affair recovery journey since. I am the betrayed. I completed HH and have been seeing a counsellor as well as a kinesiologist-counsellor. We did EMSO and couples counselling but didn’t get far in repairing the relationship as we were confused with the conflicting approaches of AR and the couples counsellor. We have completed the MFL program that AR recommended and continue to participate in the MFL group calls with a current book study by Gottman. My mate worked with a psychologist, 2 non-secular counsellors, and is currently seeing a psychiatrist, a kinesiologist-counsellor, and just started consulting a Christian counsellor. He has been on Step 1 of SLAA for 1½ years and is currently enrolled in HFH for the second time. There is very little progress in him despite all the recovery work he has been doing. He continues to live in the ‘cycle of failure’, is still very self-absorbed, and prideful. He doesn’t see how his choices continue to hurt me despite being told how numerous times. My counsellors tell me that I have made a lot of progress in healing despite starting my affair recovery journey later. Does this mean that there’s just no hope of recovering as a couple and it’s time to draw the line in the sand? Or is it simply the case that we’re not a right fit for each other? Or is there something deeper in the unconscious that is preventing him from healing?



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