Samuel addresses a significant pitfall couples fall into when trying to recover from infidelity.
I poured diesel fuel on our bonfire last Christmas Eve.
That's something I've taught my children to never do.
The results were spectacular, the flame ignited the vapor in the can and the explosion blew the can out of my hand and across the field. Thankfully I wasn't hurt, but my kids got a great reminder as to why you don't pour fuel on a fire.
This week I'd like to discuss some of the least productive things those who were betrayed did after the infidelity came to light. Just as most people would agree that pouring fuel on a fire isn't particularly productive, those taking one of our past surveys agreed that after the affair was made known certain courses of action failed to be productive.
Samuel answers a viewers question about respect and the repair process.
I've been reading about something called 'neural plasticity' in Emily Nagoski's book, Come As You Are – a book often recommended by Rick to learn about women's sexuality. In the midst of this seemingly endless period of 'recovery,' I really needed to read something positive and hopeful and validating.
How could a book discussing women's sexuality and brain science be uplifting?
When we find ourselves stuck in the slog of trying to change another's attitude about one's unfaithful spouse – when one has waited many months to see any change of heart in the unfaithful, it can get pretty discouraging.
Then I read a book that describes what science has found to be true in humans: when we act a certain way long enough, the neural connections in our brains actually change. They adapt to our new way of...
This past month, I had the opportunity to take a two-week trip traveling through Germany, Poland, Austria, the Alps, and the Czech Republic with my oldest daughter. Although I have journeyed to three of the other continents, I had never been to Europe. It was an educational trip, full of history about Jewish culture, the Nazi regime, and World War II. Growing up, I had an appreciation for history but never had great teachers on the subject. Because of this, I left for the trip excited, yet apprehensive and unsure of what I was to encounter. This would also be the longest period of time that my family would be separated, including my husband and I. I'm happy to say that we survived, and I think we are better for it.
Since we got back, I have been asked numerous times what I learned or what I was enlightened on during the trip. I am...
Samuel answers a viewer's question about making it up to the betrayed spouse.
Samuel shares more insight into why the unfaithful spouse must forgive themselves if they are going to heal.
Samuel shares the battle unfaithful spouses must work through towards self compassion.
What is the biggest predictor of how couples will respond to the trauma of betrayal? What makes recovery more difficult for some than others? What makes some more resilient than others? Answers to questions such as these are crucial for those trying to find the most productive path for their healing.
In an effort to learn more about the impact of trauma on those experiencing infidelity, Affair Recovery is conducting a survey using the Adverse Childhood Experiences scale (ACE) to determine the ongoing impact of previous trauma on individuals recovering from infidelity. If our survey shows a connection between previous childhood trauma and the trauma associated with infidelity then it may help explain one reason why recovery is more challenging for some and provide new direction for those who struggle to heal. The results of the survey will first be presented at the Hope Rising Conference, in Austin Texas on October 12, 2019.
Please take our survey below:
(function(t,e,s,n){var o,a,c;t.SMCX=t.SMCX||[],e.getElementById(n)||(o=e.getElementsByTagName(s),a=o[o.length-1],c=e....
Samuel discusses some of the most common pitfalls and cop outs spouses use when trying to heal.
What Type of Affair Was It?
Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
