Q&A Is Anxiety a Valid Reason to Leave a Marriage?

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My husband has complained since day one that our marriage puts him in a state of constant anxiety. His chief complaints: 1) I don't keep the house the way he likes it 2) I'm not thin, 3) I chew loudly, 4) I'm late, and 5) we’re not intimate enough, although he would hide away every evening, making it difficult to spend time with him. He grew up in an environment of neglect and tragedy. He used to take charge of our household but now takes little responsibility except for work and our taxes. His 2-1/2 year relationship with the affair partner is non-committal. He recently said he’s not sure if he even loves her, just likes spending time with her and he's calm when he’s with her. He doesn't live with the affair partner but visits her every weekend, opting instead to live alone in a room he rents from an elderly lady 20 minutes from us. Yet he doesn’t see our teenage children much except when I invite him to dinner and to join our family trips. He still enjoys playing board games with me. He claims I'm his best friend and loves me but can't live with me because I cause him chronic anxiety. He said that living with me was killing him for 20 years. Have I driven him away from our children by causing him such anxiety?



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