Q&A How Do I Get My Mate to Quit Criticizing My Attempts to Become Independent?

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I can't help but feel outraged that my husband is so disgusted of me (the betrayed) that he is making comments about all the efforts I am making to forward my career, do things to improve my finances, and improve myself as a person. I've been getting comments like "nice vehicle you are looking at... with that kind of mileage you'll be able to move to X on one tank of gas" or alluding to me looking for someone to replace him. He knows that my goal is to be financially independent of his parents who have been contributing a lot to our household income still, even after the affair ended... with all of the emotional complications that "help" from the parents entails. Instead of working toward financial freedom, he is retreating and is *sure* that I'm going to leave him. I am frustrated. I know I can't make him take control of his own life, so I'm simply trying to take control of mine. I am emotionally at the point where I am comfortable leaving if I need to, and he knows it, but what he doesn't know, no matter how many times I tell him, is that I am choosing to stay. And that I am emotionally honest with him and would not plan to leave without discussing my intention with him. But he thinks I am.



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