Betrayed spouse in same-sex marriage here. My wife’s emotional and physical affair was discovered in early April and ended three weeks ago. We have three young children. Recently, my wife began a friendship with an attractive single woman from a class. This new friend shares the same profession and similar looks as my wife's affair partner, which made me uneasy. Despite never being the jealous type, the affair has significantly impacted my trust. I communicated my insecurity and we discussed and agreed to boundaries for this friendship: limited communication, no venting about our marriage, no flirting, and full transparency. My wife agreed to these terms. However, her constant phone usage raised concern, I checked and discovered 1,171 deleted texts between them, contradicting wife’s insistence there was minimal communication and revealing all agreed boundaries were broken: they mocked me and my distrust, shared secrets, and flirted with sexual innuendo. I am devastated. When confronted, wife blamed me for insisting on unreasonable boundaries, focusing on fact that friend proclaims to be “straight.” I’ve waited for wife to acknowledge and attempt to make amends for this traumatic breach of trust so early in our rebuilding. My wife views my boundaries as unreasonable attempts to control her and she refuses to give up the friendship (even temporarily). Am I asking for too much control or is she being unreasonable after I gave the friendship a chance & she broke agreed boundaries?