Q&A How Can I Be Assertive without Being Aggressive about His Recovery?

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Question: 

Hello Rick,

Happy Easter!

Where can I draw the line between the two - assertiveness and aggression?

Since discovering my husband's betrayals (multiple times), and realizing that all I had given to our marriage was so easily forgotten, I've begun to assert myself and expect more emotionally and mentally from him (such as reading material regarding affairs). I find myself asking every day: Do I push for more of his effort, or do I react to his lack of effort? I would like to assertively, not aggressively, request more action in recovering this marriage, but I’m not sure how to do so without being ‘pushy’.

It is not my wish to control his recovery, but I fear that he would have no 'recovery' to speak of, if I did not ask him if he'd read about his path today or some such side-ways question

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What type of affair was it?

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I would highly recommend giving this a try.
 
-D, Texas