Q&A How Can I Heal Given This Reality?

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My husband and I are 3.5 months from D-Day. We’re in the fourth week of EMS Online and we are in couples therapy. My husband is in individual therapy working on his own childhood traumas surrounding physically and emotionally abusive parents. I spent a good portion of my early adulthood in therapy recovering from childhood sexual abuse, violent and alcoholic parents and PTSD. My husband took up with an old girlfriend who he’s had an affair with before. He says while he’s given her up completely he still loves her, but loves me more. My question is, how do I know the truth of my story? The process keeps asking me to control my flooding and triggers by using the truth? What is the truth if he loves us both? I fear this will be the WALL I can never get around, since in all of their letters they reiterate their truth again and again those facts are: they’ve got this pact to love one another forever regardless of their current partners. So what is truth? What is MY truth? How do I apply the reality of not knowing what HIS perceived truth is in reality as apposed to their fantasy or reality? And how do I apply this to my healing?



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