Q&A How Can I Make Disclosure Safe?

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Question: 

My husband asked me to tell him everything I did with my AP that might show the way I betrayed him. I told him everything and we agreed if anything else comes to my mind, I’ll go and tell him. Lately I’m struggling with a different type of confession: the AP told me he was, at some point, in jail for some kind of fraud. It did not bother me at that time, in the end I wasn't planning to marry him, it was his gf’s problem, so to speak. I think that this would speak volumes to my husband, about how much of an obsession (love, he would say) I had for that man. I think he would consider it as a betrayal and he would like to know it. But I’m scared that, with this information, he might someday get angry and tell someone at AP’s work, as a form of revenge. I know that for the AP, this would be life damaging (not that it would compare with what’s happening in OUR lives) and I’m very scared that he would try and hurt my husband. What should I do?

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