Q&A How Can Sex Be Special Again?

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Question: 

Hello, I need help to understand how sex can be special again after my husbands year long affair. We both had never been with anyone else until he had this affair. He says he never stopped loving me and had no intention of replacing me, but that he felt I didn't desire him sexually and wanted that feeling. I feel so devalued now because even though he loved me, he seems to have believed that she would be a good replacement for me sexually. He says that relationship was fleeting and that he had enough reality checks to know it wasn't "real", however, he wasn't willing to end it until I accidentally found out. We've spent the past 5 months learning and healing. I know that men are so different from women in their ability to compartmentalize and that helps me understand how he could have sex without love, but it's hard to accept that he could so easily shut me out of his mind. He says that what we have is worlds apart from what the affair was, but I still just don't see how sex is special anymore if he could so easily enjoy another woman. It seems so meaningless. How can I believe that it is special again?

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I would highly recommend giving this a try.
 
-D, Texas