What to do When Your Body Remembers the Trauma of Infidelity

Betrayal is a pain like no other. 10 years ago, I didn't know that there was science behind the physical reality I was feeling each year as I passed the anniversary of beginning Affair Recovery. Lynn is the author of Keep Walking, 40 Days to Hope and Freedom after Betrayal, a devotional for woman dealing with the trauma and heartache of betrayal.

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Thank you Lynn! I SO needed

Thank you Lynn! I SO needed to hear this today! 4 years ago this week, I found out about my husband's affair and I confronted him on Christmas Day, 2012. I am feeling exactly what you described and I'm so glad there is a name for it and that I'm not just going crazy!! He trickled out the truth all the way up until this past April, and it was so much deeper and worse than I initially discovered. I think I have many Ddays! But this time of year is definitely the worst! I find that I can barely even drag out the Christmas decorations and I have to force myself to decorate even minimally. I have made it a point to be alone every Christmas Day since Dday 1 because I get so emotional and feel those chest pains, etc that you described. I find hope in you saying that this will eventually go away...I sure hope so because everyone in my family thinks I should be past this and happy again and have started telling me to get over it since I decided to stay in the marriage. That's easy for them to say!!


Thank you for your comment! I'm so glad to let you know you are not alone. I hope you get a little more empathy from your family this year. I think it would be okay to ask them for grace and understanding. It's hard to understand the effects of trauma like betrayal when you haven't lived through it. I am praying for you this holiday season!


I also feel like I have a lot of DDays. My husbands affairs came out over the few months we were deciding to divorce. So I feel like my body is just full of cellular memories for a ton of DDays.

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