, 1 day 7 hours ago

Rick Reynolds, the founder and lead therapist at AffairRecovery.com, oftentimes says we learn far more from failure than we can ever learn in success. It's a principle that can be applied in everyday life, and specifically, in recovery from infidelity or addiction. How we handle failure can determine our next phase of life, and our next...

, 1 week 1 day ago

Today you'll hear five key factors that can either stall your recovery or actually speed it up. That's right; you did read that correctly: your healing can be accelerated if you utilize these five key principles and tools. Alternatively, if you choose to ignore these tools, your own repair...

, 2 weeks 1 day ago

Emotional boundaries are essential if a couple is going to survive the upheaval of infidelity or addiction. A boundaryless recovery will exacerbate all parties, including children,...

, 3 weeks 1 day ago

For decades, mental health professionals have stressed the need to have a healthy self-image in life. From self-love, to self-actualization, how we see ourselves is a true game changer, not only in our primary relationships, but also in life. How much more should our self-image be repaired after the disclosure of infidelity? After betrayal trauma...

, 4 weeks 1 day ago

On the path of beginning to heal a relationship after infidelity, oftentimes in the middle of a fight, a spouse or partner may not know what they need in that moment. They don’t know if they need answers, comfort, direction, or to have their hand held. Science says it takes 1/200th of a second for the betrayed spouse to...

, 1 month 6 days ago

It's no secret that infidelity is traumatizing. But what about childhood trauma? What about neglect and/or abuse as a child? The hard truth is, healing from all levels of trauma is difficult, and infidelity trauma doesn't help. When trying to heal from this type of pain, it's vital we have practical tools that we can use to find solace and ultimately, learn to self-soothe. Today, Samuel shares four tools he has used in his own journey of healing, from...

, 1 month 2 weeks ago

Healing from infidelity requires expert care in every facet of both personal and marital restoration. However, a nebulous area of healing can be found in addressing childhood wounds like neglect, abuse, and abandonment. Without an understanding of what wounds and pain we've experienced as children, we can find that the timeline for us is not only confusing, but also longer and more erratic. When we tap into the help of true trauma experts who have been through their own timeline of infidelity and...

, 1 month 3 weeks ago

Have you ever had your unfaithful spouse blame you for their infidelity or addiction? Perhaps they've rattled off statements like "if you would have done your job, I wouldn't have had to go find love elsewhere?" Or, "if you didn't neglect me, I wouldn't have had to go somewhere else for attention, love, and sex." It's a coping mechanism the unfaithful uses to justify their actions, and one of the main problems with this thinking is that we, the unfaithful, think it's absolute truth. What's more...

, 2 months 4 days ago

Finding survivors of either their own infidelity or their spouse's, who are also willing to publicly talk about their story, is no easy task. From the public shame, to the fear of being known for such painful life choices, to the uneasiness of telling your story in public, it's just not easy. Today you'll get to know Stephanie, a fearless survivor of her husband's infidelity, addiction, and child out of wedlock. As we talk, you'll hear a down to earth, "I'm not superwoman; I'm just someone who did the...

, 2 months 1 week ago

Trying to heal from your partner's affair, or your own, can seem like an impossible task. But what about when there is a child from an affair? What if they are a sex addict? What if you don't feel like you even love your partner now? While all hard-hitting, complicated questions, I am happy to tell you there are answers. Oftentimes, we believe people who have actually healed from seemingly impossible pain and trauma are better answers than mere words. Today you'll meet heroes of ours at affairrecovery...

, 2 months 2 weeks ago

Transforming our betrayal and relationship trauma is no easy task. It can feel impossible to keep our heads above water at times, not to mention the fact that life happening around you never stops to make your healing easier. Quite frankly, we don't always feel like doing the hard work of recovery, and we'd rather just shut down and hide from everyone and everything. Today, Samuel shares four game-changing solutions to provide a framework to healing our own betrayal and relationship trauma. In a world...

, 2 months 3 weeks ago

When a couple feels stuck, both parties are exhausted, frustrated, and often wondering if there is any hope that things will ever get better. It's as if even mere communication about everyday life can be triggering, and any conversation ends up with a fight about tone, intent, and who hurt who more. The good news is, while this type of paralysis is normal, couples and individuals don't have to remain stuck. There are proven tools that can help one or both spouses care for themselves and their partner...

, 3 months 2 days ago

How we repattern our lives after infidelity can make or break the relationship, in both the short and the long term. Without a plan to develop new habits, new patterns and new routines, the relationship can feel stuck, overwhelmed with drudgery, and filled with disappointment. The goal after an affair or addiction is never getting back to what the couple had, but discovering something new - new energy and new patterns that the relationship is going to need to survive and yes, even flourish, moving...

, 3 months 1 week ago

Caring for ourselves after we've either betrayed our spouse, or been betrayed, is essential. However, due to the sheer panic and trauma of it all, we often will put ourselves last and look after the well-being of our partner, IF they will allow us to. While it may seem counterintuitive, for long-term healing, both individually and in our relationship, caring for ourselves must be a top priority. It's normal to think our lives will never be the same again after trauma of this magnitude. While our...

, 3 months 2 weeks ago

After an affair, we can feel left for dead. It's like we're lepers, and the outside world seemingly refuses to be associated with us. It can happen to the unfaithful, but oddly enough, it can happen to the betrayed as well. Outside observers have no idea what to say to us, so rather than try, they typically will leave us alone out of discomfort, or be instructed to leave us alone by clergy, leadership or even family members. The truth is, those whose lives have been shattered by infidelity need more support after disclosure...

, 3 months 3 weeks ago

After the disclosure of infidelity or addiction, our futures feel incredibly uncertain. If there is one universal, common emotion or feeling after disclosure, it’s probably raw terror. Both partners experience it, but how do you work through it? How do you process it? Today, Samuel shares his own traumatic event that was filled with not only uncertainty and confusion, but raw panic and terror. In the halls of ‘healing from infidelity’ the word trauma has become somewhat of a buzzword. Trauma isn’t...

, 4 months 8 hours ago

When a spouse or partner has an affair, their next response is essential. Are they willing to do repair work? Are they willing to own what they need to own? Are they open to getting outside, expert help in an effort to see what they cannot see? It can be like walking a tightrope for either partner who is wanting to save the relationship, but isn't sure where the lines should be drawn to protect themselves, but also humble themselves and win back their partner. Unfaithful spouses can feel as though...

, 4 months 1 week ago

Infidelity is life-changing, life-altering trauma for ourselves, our partners, and even our kids. We can feel “left for dead” immediately following disclosure, and it would seem almost no one truly knows how to support those of us in crisis due to infidelity or addiction. What’s vital is that we are there for ourselves. While it may seem like a hollow suggestion or a cheesy Hallmark card, it is key that we are able to understand the principle of caring for ourselves, despite the temptation to wallow...

, 4 months 2 weeks ago

While not everyone who has an affair or acts out is a sex addict, there ARE moments we as unfaithful partners attempt to stay in denial to help mitigate our own shame and feelings of discomfort. If we’re not in denial about what we’ve done, maybe we’re in denial about the impact of our choices upon our significant other, or family as a whole? One thing you can count on today: what never brings healing is hiding from the impact of our choices on everyone around us. In fact, a critical piece of the...

, 4 months 3 weeks ago

Trying to win back a betrayed partner's heart after shattering them with your infidelity is not an easy task. It's a challenge, but a worthwhile pursuit. While some betrayeds are not willing to allow their hearts to be pursued or won back after infidelity, many are willing and even aching for that reconnection. The struggle is how to do so, when the betrayed barely understands their own pain, trauma and confusing reactions. The unfaithful can misread their cues and find themselves growing more and...

, 5 months 5 days ago

When a relationship has been devastated by infidelity or addiction, we need answers. We want help, we want solace, and we want our broken hearts to heal. But, not everyone is as eager as we think they should be to seek healing. But why? Is it because of a past wound from a professional? Is it because the unfaithful has new information to share that they refuse to give up? Whatever the reason, refusing to get help after you've cheated or your spouse has cheated causes even more suspicion and...

, 5 months 1 week ago

Healing from infidelity is not for the faint of heart. After the disclosure of an affair, both spouses find themselves traumatized, looking for answers, direction and hope. As society has evolved and infidelity has become its own epidemic, there seems to be a wealth of advice being thrown out across...

, 5 months 2 weeks ago

The journey of the unfaithful spouse eventually reveals a need to confront shame. Those who feel ashamed often continue to do shameful things, and we know infidelity can be incredibly shameful for all parties involved, even for peripheral family members and close friends. Without a plan to confront and heal shame in the life of the unfaithful, both parties in the relationship or marriage can feel behind schedule, if not altogether stuck. The good news is, shame doesn’t have to be the taskmaster in the...

, 6 months 3 days ago

The absolute last thing anyone needs after the personal discovery or experience of infidelity is more shame and isolation. However, two of the most commonly experienced emotions after infidelity has been discovered are both paralyzing shame and decimating isolation. At affairrecovery.com, we use this phrase quite often...

, 6 months 1 week ago

Intimacy avoidance remains one of the most challenging aspects of both short-term and long-term recovery from an affair. Whether four months into repair work or four years in, the couple that remains impinged by intimacy avoidance struggles to gain any lasting momentum at all. Without a strategic,...

, 6 months 2 weeks ago

"Will my marriage or relationship ever be the same again?" This is one of the most common questions when a couple enters a therapist's office, wondering if they can actually survive infidelity. There are no easy answers, but there is tangible hope when the right guidance and pathways are provided to couples in crisis. While infidelity is extremely traumatic for a marriage, it doesn't have to be the end, or figuratively cremate the relationship while the couple makes mistake after mistake wondering why...

, 6 months 3 weeks ago

"Can a marriage recover from an affair" is one of the most popular questions we are asked at affairrecovery.com. The answer is a resounding YES, if both parties are willing to do the work and commit to the process. Today, Alumnus Samuel shares practical and refreshing insight into answering that question, and how to do it. Rebuilding a marriage that has been ransacked by infidelity or addiction is no easy task, but it IS possible, when both parties have a proven blueprint for their own individual work...

, 7 months 1 day ago

Finding the courage to keep going after your own world has been rocked by infidelity or addiction is one of the most excruciating processes an adult can find themselves in. Discovering there are not only survivors of infidelity, but those who have come out on the other side healed, forgiven, and restored, can bring hope and courage to others forging through the challenging seasons of...

, 7 months 1 week ago

Have you ever wondered if you or your partner is a narcissist? Or a sex addict? This may surprise you, but being labeled a narcissist or sex addict are two of the most over-diagnosed labels that ...

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