Signs That the Unfaithful Partner Is Unsafe in Affair Recovery Work

Are you a betrayed partner reeling from infidelity, looking for signs to see if your unfaithful mate is taking steps to be safe? Have you ever wondered about what the markers of safety in affair recovery might look like in the first place? There are signs to look for that not only create a sense of safety between partners, but make the painful but necessary recovery process that much easier to wade through. Today you'll hear Samuel speak first to you, the betrayed partner, as he lays out signs that your spouse or partner may be unsafe. Samuel will then offer important insight for the unfaithful to use as a guidepost as they help and support their mate, who is in crisis from betrayal trauma. The good news is, while there is no easy button or silver bullet, there is a better path to healing.

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I’ve heard it all !

Counselor #8 ! And still not safe. Shouldn’t my wife display remorse and expressions like you described after 23 years? When I accuse her of lying (for our entire marriage) and even as of last year she gets angry and tells the counselor “He calls me a liar”. Offended by the truth ! Never feeling so bad for lying to me, cheating, etc.. Shouldn’t it bother her deeply about lying instead of the “label”. Shouldn’t she be upset with the facts that she had lied, cheated, deceived, and conspired ? Shouldn’t it bother her that she knows I don’t believe and I don’t trust her STILL. Literally last week in counseling she said AGAIN “He makes me call it an affair”. “You wouldn’t wear your ring”,” You wouldn’t stay home” that’s why she did it. She calls it a “fling” and denies ANY emotions for feelings for him(s). And she’ll say I went through years of counseling, read books, got deeper into religion. To me it check the boxes. There have been significant other issues of betrayal MANY even as of this last year. Add more insult to my injuries the counselor says “Is any of this going on now ?”. Shutting me down giving her a pass as everyone else has. I’m the offender and she the victim. Concentrate on the here and now not the “past”. No one calls her out no one holds her accountable or challenges her. I’m the one that needs help as she has so concretely convinced other of. No follow up from counselors her parents or questions. Even the mother in law and allies no idea. The truth from her parents is still hidden. And I stand convicted and judged by my mother in law that it is I that have been the dysfunctional one and “My precious daughter” has had to live with our entire marriage with my dysfunctions-not hers, and it is I that have” Brainwashed” her and it seems though “He is surrounded by a legion of demons”.

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