Q&A How Do You Move Past Regret Into Acceptance?

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One of the personal responsibilities reads, “if you can’t accept where you’re at, you’ll never get to where you’re going.” I’ve taken Hope for Healing and my spouse and I are currently in EMS Online, so I’ve learned a lot already, but I’m having a hard time not feeling regretful. I feel regretful over past sexual mistakes prior to meeting my spouse, I regret my affairs, and I also struggle with a lot of regret in getting married in the first place to my spouse. I feel terrible for this because after my affairs they wanted a divorce and I fought for us to stay together and they decided to stay, but I’m also plagued by a plethora of issues that have wounded me, like a porn addiction, lying/hiding, addictive behaviors, avoidant personality, lack of emotional intelligence and difficulty being attentive and in tune with me emotionally. I don’t want to focus on the speck in their eye while I’m still dealing with the log in my own and I don’t want to sound ungrateful for their forgiveness and grace, but I’m also struggling. My actions and his behaviors leave me feeling hopeless at times for us, and that’s when I move into regret and what ifs. I know I cannot change the past, so how do I keep moving forward in healthy acceptance?



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