Q&A How Do You Move Past Regret Into Acceptance?

One of the personal responsibilities reads, “if you can’t accept where you’re at, you’ll never get to where you’re going.” I’ve taken Hope for Healing and my spouse and I are currently in EMS Online, so I’ve learned a lot already, but I’m having a hard time not feeling regretful. I feel regretful over past sexual mistakes prior to meeting my spouse, I regret my affairs, and I also struggle with a lot of regret in getting married in the first place to my spouse. I feel terrible for this because after my affairs they wanted a divorce and I fought for us to stay together and they decided to stay, but I’m also plagued by a plethora of issues that have wounded me, like a porn addiction, lying/hiding, addictive behaviors, avoidant personality, lack of emotional intelligence and difficulty being attentive and in tune with me emotionally. I don’t want to focus on the speck in their eye while I’m still dealing with the log in my own and I don’t want to sound ungrateful for their forgiveness and grace, but I’m also struggling. My actions and his behaviors leave me feeling hopeless at times for us, and that’s when I move into regret and what ifs. I know I cannot change the past, so how do I keep moving forward in healthy acceptance?