Q&A How Long Should I Accept and Validate His Exaggerated Reactions as a Result of My Previously Reckless Behaviors?

To watch the video please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
To watch the video, please purchase a subscription to the Recovery Library.
Gain unlimited access to over 1,800 articles and expert Q&A videos.
Already a Recovery Library member? Log in to listen to the full recording.


Me and my spouses' relationship was destructive in the sense that I got upset for anything. I blamed him for things that wasn't his fault, I would be disrespectful and selfish, and he didn't stand up for himself when that happened. I cheated with a one night stand and now we are in Week 10 of EMS Online because of my infidelity. He had unfaithful behaviors too that he disclosed after I disclosed mine. He recently started working with that parallel to EMS Online for my betrayal. Its been 3 months since last disclosure and we are struggling a lot. He is resentful, bitter and angry all the time. Whatever I do is a trigger for him either about my infidelity or about my old behaviors. I have to be absolutely perfect, otherwise the whole evening is ruined, he is grumpy says that I shattered all trust he slowly starts building, all hope for a change. I legit feel burned out from trying to work on myself, and there is little patience or understanding that it takes time, or for me struggling extra to change because I am hurt, angry, resentful for his betrayal too. How long should I accept and validate his angry, resentful, inpatient, and exaggerated reactions as a result of my previously reckless behaviors? Nothing I do is enough. I feel like if this is never going to end, we cant stay together because I will never be perfect no matter how much I go in therapy, because I am human.



RL_Media Type: 

What type of affair was it?

Our free Affair Analyzer provides you with insights about your unique situation and gives you a personalized plan of action.
Take the Affair Analyzer

Free Surviving Infidelity Bootcamp

Our experts designed this step-by-step guide to help you survive infidelity. Be intentional with your healing with this free 7-day bootcamp.
I would highly recommend giving this a try.
-D, Texas