Q&A Is It Possible That My Partner Is a Sex Addict?

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Question: 

I’ve been married for 28 years with two grown children. It’s been almost 2 years since D-day. My husband and I are involved with MFL and we attended the EMS weekend about 6 months ago. I’m still struggling with understanding my husbands affairs. He had a 6 year affair with an old friend from high school via email, phone, and sexting (including lots of masterbating with one AP via phone conversations). This “friend” lives across the country and they did not meet in person. The other affair was with his co-worker that lasted 6/8 months. He admitted to kissing her on three occasions after the AP told me. He also admits to sexting and flirting and sharing lots of sexual fantasies with her. From the moment I found out, the affairs stopped. I have 2 questions. Does this sound like a sex addiction? My husband thinks he doesn’t have a sex addiction because he has stopped the destructive behavior. Also, my husband cannot express any kind of emotions he felt for either of these women. He said it was small talk and sex talk. He can not describe any feelings he had regarding these women. I don’t know if he shared his feelings with them or not. Why can’t he verbalize his feelings? I know I’m not always the safest when I question him about his past communications, but I have a burning desire to know how and what he said to them. I’m stuck, Rick, and I know your words and wisdom can help me move forward.

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