Q&A What Do You Do If Your Spouse Truly Believes They Do Not Have a Problem or Addiction?

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My spouse has been using pornography heavily for years since he was introduced to it as a child in addition to other sexual activities he was involved in during his childhood. We had been married 5 years when we had our first d-day, 2 years ago, where he spoke about it for the first time in detail. He says he was porn free after this disclosure, even though he didn't go through counselling, therapy or get any help, resources, and so forth. 5 months ago, he used pornography again for the first time in 2 years, at which point we had our 2nd D-day. He claims this is an isolated incident and he just has a lust issue. I'm struggling here because I truly want to move on and heal, I've been reading about pornograhy and healing, and listening to christian resources about it and truly want him to heal, but his inability to admit pornograhy as an addiction, and address it specifically or get help for it is making me feel very unsafe. Its as though he wants to completely disassociate with the word, addiction or is afraid of being labelled as an addict as opposed to trying to understand and explore it, the childhood wounds, etc. I'm trying to be sensitive, understanding there's guilt, shame, and haven't vocalised all this to him.



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