Have you ever driven in really thick fog? We live near the Mississippi river, where a lot of tributaries feed into the waterway. I didn't grow up in this region (I'm a native Texan), but what I find is that certain mornings of the year, the hills and valleys surrounding our home become blanketed in a thick fog. It becomes so heavy over the roadways that in order to drive, you have to put your headlights on the low beam and drive very slow. You can't see anything. All of the curves and turns seem to sneak up on you. What were once familiar roads become scary and unknown. It can be suffocating because you have no point of reference. I also get very impatient when I drive in fog. I don't like not being able to see so I find myself turning on my high beams, thinking I can see further ahead but instead I am just blinded even more.
The early...
Samuel discusses how to defeat hopelessness when recovering from the devastation of infidelity.
Katherine, an inspiring woman and betrayed spouse, shares a life changing moment from her healing journey:
January 28, 2013 marked the third anniversary of my mother's death. It also would have been her 80th birthday.
My mother loved her children and her grandchildren well. Her love flowed from a deep well of love for Jesus. She was a woman of prayer. When I was a teenager, young women from our church would come over to share a glass of ice tea with her as she shared her love and faith with them.
It would be tempting to wax nostalgic, but I will resist. My mother faced many tough choices and I'm not sure all of the choices she made were wise ones. She was very close to her family, but she left them to follow my father as he served in the Marine Corps. Abandonment, abuse,...
Samuel shares a tool that helped change his own recovery with Samantha.
The visceral experience of being betrayed has triggered thoughts that consume my mind yet again. I haven't slept more than three hours straight in many months and the Benadryl I regularly take just leaves me feeling groggy. I only have two hours before I have to be in front of the first of many demanding clients today. My efforts to make it through the motions of my morning have been interrupted by my teenage daughter's demands. She desperately wants me to accommodate her schedule in order to have time with friends this afternoon. I tell her it's not going to work today. As the demand relentlessly continues, I blow a gasket . . .
An intolerable feeling of pressure rises up in my stomach. Negative emotions of frustration build and finally give way to rage. I try not to speak but I can't help myself . . . so I yell . . ....
Today I am journaling about codependency because I truly hate the word. I wish someone decades ago could have come up with a nicer sounding word to fit the definition.
When I began some honest soul searching of my character flaws that led me to cheat on my husband, I began to realize that I am a poster child for codependency. Looking back on my life and choices, I have spent years outrunning being identified as “codependent” to any degree. Part of my personality (that I am still coming to terms with) is that I have mostly been the type of person who has to learn through failure and mistakes. So many times I have run so far from something only to find myself smacked in the face into the very thing I was running from to begin with. (Insert eye roll and deep sigh emoji here)
It felt like...
Affair Recovery is making some changes to Recovery Library Memberships.
Nine years ago, our vision for the Recovery Library was to create an immense database of expert knowledge. A large part of this database stemmed from our Recovery Library Members and the questions submitted for the Expert Q...
Samuel interviews an unfaithful, female therapist, who helps couples in crisis due to infidelity.
Samuel encourages those who are struggling to keep the momentum in their personal repair work.
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