Q&A Am I a Hypocrite for Staying?

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Question: 

I raised my daughter to be independent. I hope she will remain God-fearing. I taught her she cannot control other people, only herself and if someone hurts and disrespects her, she doesn’t deserve that. She has the power to remove herself from hurtful and harmful relationships. As the betrayed, I wonder how she will view me for trying to salvage this marriage. I’m a hypocrite because I still believe in what I taught her. She’s my only child that I had late in life, and she looks up to me. We’re close, and at 18 years old she still enjoys my company. I’m sure she will experience romantic disappointment. What do I tell her then? I’m no longer a good example of the strong independent woman she’s admired. The infidelity destroyed that too. My husband and I often sequester ourselves to complete the EMSO course at home. I’m sure she suspects something. She’s always asking “what’s wrong, mom? Won’t we will have to tell her at some point? I’ve kept her father’s infidelity a secret from everyone. Will I have to keep it from her too? Everything seems to work in favor of the unfaithful. They get to indulge in their immature, destructive behavior. Betrayed lives implode while we have to control our thoughts, emotions, and flooding. This secret maintains his image; I can’t conceal my sadness. We either lie, or I hide from everyone. If my daughter rejects or judges my choice, that will be the end for me.

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