Hi Rick - I've been struggling with forgiveness, intrusive thoughts, acceptance of my husband's infidelity and just the basic understanding of how to let go of the pain. I believe that God can heal and restore our marriage, but my new struggle is thinking that I don't want to stay married to him. I am only a little more than 5 months from discovery and I know I need to give this more time, but I truly hate my husband, not just what he did over the course of our entire marriage, but uncovering who he really was. I would love to stay married as I believe we have an above average chance of thriving and in spite of my absolute hatred, I know he has good qualities as I see God working in his life. However, my mind can't get past the magnitude of his affairs and all the dirty, vile details that go with it. Have you ever heard of someone wanting to stay married and believing in the power of God's healing, but still choosing that the betrayal was too great and too deep to stay married?