Q&A Why Does Our Fresh Start Seem Stale?

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Rick, My husband and I are working in recovery. Both of us are in counseling. Can you speak to the hurt spouse who is waiting for the unfaithful to put into action some of the things learned about how to have a deeper, more intimate marriage? We have both read the Gotten book "7 Principles to making Marriage Work". My therapist has likened it to having a book all about exercise and knowing all of the information about how good it is for you while sitting on the couch eating potato chips and doing nothing. I feel like my husband has all of the tools to make this marriage amazing, but is resistant. He does not initiate any conversations or "exercises". When I try to ask him open-ended questions he says things like, "I don't think like that" or "I don't know". I am so tired of being disappointed. Every weekend I hope for him to ask me on a date and talk to me and get to know me all over again, and every weekend I am disappointed. If we are starting fresh, why does everything feel so stale? Thank you for your ministry.



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