Q&A Can You Provide Clarification on Not Asking Relational Comparison Questions?

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I have been diagnosed with PTSD due to the copious amounts of info I have including texts and videos in addition to the blame and rationalizations from my wife. Her relationship with her affair partner, 30 years her senior, was emotionally manipulative and abusive and she is finally seeing the light after 2 years. Can you provide clarification on not asking relational comparison questions? It seems I have a right to know how my spouse acted with another man who only used her for one way sexual favors and how she engages with me. Physical comparison questions, photos, and videos have been fantastic for me to see as they provide no better proof of her affairing down. Sometimes I look at them when I’m feeling down and I can laugh at how inadequate the affair partner was. How can I make a decision to stay if I’m supposed to avoid asking how and why she acted with her affair predator when it appears better and more passionate than how she interacts with me? The notion of it was fantasy is nonsense. Her relationship was abusive and predatory. I deserve the fantasy every so often. I’m the one who was always emotionally available and present with my spouse and physically the affair partner isn’t even close to my level. I’m disgusted by the idea of staying with someone who gives her affair partner her best effort and his sexual needs are highly valued but she’s not making the same effort with me 2 years down the road.



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