Samuel answers the question: "What does it mean to own it in repair work?"
Samuel answers the question of whether the betrayed spouse should be farther along than they are.
Unfaithful Spouses,
You have been working really hard. Since discovery, you have received a chance at a new life, and you are determined to change your behavior. You want to see crumbs of hope in your marital relationship, but all you see is pain. What is likely underneath that pain is a violation so deep that you might not even be able to comprehend it for the first year.
Maybe you feel shut out as your betrayed spouse acts in ways you don't think are beneficial. Perhaps you don't understand why your betrayed spouse keeps information from you--even something as innocent as them meeting with a close friend for lunch and not telling you about it. Maybe it is more serious than that, and you see them becoming careless with their own behavior. Maybe they start drinking too much or not telling you when they will be home. Or maybe you...
Samuel shares insight from his own personal journey on finding personal healing and restoration.
Samuel answers a popular question from betrayed spouses.
Samuel discusses what contempt does to couples who are trying to heal from infidelity or addiction.
Samuel shares critical insight for both the unfaithful and betrayed spouse who are trying to heal.
Samuel discusses what to do when couples feel stuck.
Samuel answers a question from an unfaithful spouse.
Today, my heart is reminded of the pain that once was, the pain that so many of you find yourselves in today. For me, it is a distant, tender scar. It is healing, but if I stare at it long enough or touch it in just the right ways, the pain can all come rushing back.
If you are in the middle of this kind of suffering, you are likely desperate for relief of any kind. Violently painful memories have carved your heart into pieces, and maybe you can't even remember what life looked like before this whirlwind of torment took over your life.
Suffering takes on different forms for different people, but it is important to remember that both the repentant Unfaithful and forgiving Betrayed will experience torment. Though it might be tempting to keep score or claim that the Unfaithful has forfeited their right to feel badly, it does no one any good to go down...
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