As past participants, we want our walks through infidelity to bring hope, inspiration, and courage to your own journey.
, 2 months 1 week ago
prodigals-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Prodigals


In the Bible, one of the most beloved, well known, and controversial stories is one that Jesus told of the Prodigal son.

, 2 months 1 week ago

Samuel shares a few humorous stories about he and Samantha's recovery work after infidelity.

, 2 months 1 week ago

Samuel discusses a tool to avoid unnecessary conflict in repair work.

, 2 months 1 week ago
acceptance  the last stage of grief or the beginning of a true journey-survivors Blog-Chase-Acceptance

Acceptance, The last stage of grief or the beginning of the true journey?

I've had the urge to write this blog for some time, but I keep finding myself putting it off. I know it will take some effort and may not flow as easily as some of the earlier ones. This process started for me when I heard a well-known quote from the famous philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard:...

, 2 months 2 weeks ago
looking at the roots of our shame enables us to find healing-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Do-I-Have-a-Love-Addiction

Early on in recovery, I was so angry at my husband for suggesting I have a love addiction. I am so ashamed to think of how prideful I can be. In my mind, a woman with a so-called love addiction had serious issues. I had a stereotype in my head that this would be a woman constantly on dating sites, wearing clothing from Victoria's Secret, or someone completely...

, 2 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel provides a follow up to an earlier interview with a betrayed male spouse.

, 2 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel provides a much anticipated interview with a betrayed male spouse.

, 2 months 3 weeks ago
the pain is horrible but if you stay the course it will end-survivors blog-elizabeth-driving-in-fog

Have you ever driven in really thick fog? We live near the Mississippi river, where a lot of tributaries feed into the waterway. I didn't grow up in this region (I'm a native Texan), but what I find is that certain mornings of the year, the hills and valleys surrounding our home become blanketed in a thick fog. It becomes so heavy over the roadways that in order to drive, you have...

, 2 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel discusses how to defeat hopelessness when recovering from the devastation of infidelity.

, 2 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel shares a tool that helped change his own recovery with Samantha.

, 2 months 3 weeks ago
its not the experience of feeling anger that leads to negative consequences but how i choose to respond

Oh the anger . . .

The visceral experience of being betrayed has triggered thoughts that consume my mind yet again. I haven't slept more than three hours straight in many months and the Benadryl I regularly take just leaves me feeling groggy. I only have two hours before I have to be in front of the first of many demanding clients today. My efforts to make it through the motions of my...

, 2 months 4 weeks ago
the ugly truth about codependency-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-The-Ugly-Truth-About-Codependency

Today I am journaling about codependency because I truly hate the word. I wish someone decades ago could have come up with a nicer sounding word to fit the definition.

When I began some honest soul searching of my character flaws that led me to cheat on my husband, I began to realize that I am a poster...

, 3 months 12 hours ago

Affair Recovery is making some changes to Recovery Library Memberships.

Nine years ago, our vision for the Recovery Library was to create an immense database of expert knowledge. A large part of this database stemmed from our Recovery Library Members and the questions submitted for the Expert Q...

, 3 months 18 hours ago

Samuel interviews an unfaithful, female therapist, who helps couples in crisis due to infidelity.

, 3 months 2 days ago

Samuel interviews an unfaithful, female therapist, who helps couples in crisis due to infidelity.

, 3 months 1 week ago

Samuel encourages those who are struggling to keep the momentum in their personal repair work.

, 3 months 1 week ago

Samuel shares a necessary adjustment to early recovery work for those in crisis.

, 3 months 1 week ago
you can't do this alone-survivors blog-chase-angels amont us

During college, I had five very close friends. After graduating, we all moved off to separate parts of the country and began to conquer our small piece of the world. As time went on, somehow, we all wound up marrying women that got along with one another. A few summers later, we all rented a beach house together for a week just to reunite. The trip was such a success it turned into an annual ritual. One we...

, 3 months 1 week ago
survivors blog-Elizabeth-is infidelity hereditary-we can change our story

Is Infidelity Hereditary?

I ask myself this question a lot. I guess it's more of a fear of mine than a question. In a rational state of mind I can answer this easily: of course not. Infidelity is a choice. No one put a gun to my head and made me cross the line. No one forced me to be unfaithful. And like the source for eye color or...

, 3 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel discusses the sensitive topic of when betrayed spouses have affairs of their own.

, 3 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel discusses ways of finding support in recovery work.

, 3 months 2 weeks ago
is change really possible-survivors Blog-Chase-Should-I-Stay-or-Should-I-Go

"Should I stay or should I go? If I go, there will be trouble. If I stay, it will be double . . ."
~The Clash

I am a child of schoolhouse rock, a product of the age in which skate parks were invented, parachute pants were high...

, 3 months 2 weeks ago
Be Bold-Survivors Blog-Elizabeth-What-I-Need-From-You

Today my words come from a very insecure and needy place. Insecure because I'm trying hard to use words instead of behaviors to show how I feel and what I need. This "voice" seems childlike and continues to grow because it is still somewhat unfamiliar to me. My words might sound crazy but I promise I'm not a lunatic! My psychologist refers to me in "parts" like this, so I am going to do the same here today.

The needy...

, 3 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel shares insight on what the betrayed spouse can and should do when their unfaithful wont lead recovery efforts.

, 4 months 5 days ago

Samuel discusses a poignant topic in recovery work regarding the unfaithful spouse.

, 4 months 1 week ago

Samuel tackles a common question of betrayed spouses who are endeavoring to pursue their own healing.

, 4 months 1 week ago
forgiveness isn't an ending act, but rather the beginning of a journey - survivors blog - chase

I drive a relatively new truck so I found it especially frustrating to pull out of the dealership repair shop only to find my "check engine" light was on. Again. This was the 4th time in a month I had gone back to the same dealership for the same repair. My witty and wise 14-year-old daughter was enjoying my frustration when she asked,

"Why do you keep going back to the bad haircut place?"

"What?" I replied confused and irritated....

, 4 months 1 week ago
be humble about past and present - survivors blog - elizabeth

We are more than a year out from discovery. Some of the days have been very slow making me wonder if progress has been made. And although we now have more good days than bad, a small internal voice still occasionally asks, am I really changing?

While you, the betrayed, are trying to heal from what we, the unfaithful, have done to you, I also know you are ultimately waiting for redemption.

There are days my husband's anxiety seems to come out of nowhere. Of course I understand the root of the...

, 4 months 1 week ago

Samuel answers a viewers question on what to do when there are multiple relapses.

, 4 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel answers a viewers question on what you should do when you've lost respect for your unfaithful spouse.