As past participants, we want our walks through infidelity to bring hope, inspiration, and courage to your own journey.
, 8 months 3 weeks ago
affair recovery-survivors blog-elizabeth-the other woman

Dear Betrayed Wife,

I am the other woman.

By admitting that, I know I am the one person that truly and most easily deserves your hatred and your spite. I know I am a source of your anger and contempt. I am a huge source of your pain. Essentially, I am the person that is largely responsible for the ache in your heart that seems like it will never go away.

I am quite certain you must periodically wish that I had never existed. Of course, I am making a...

, 8 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel interviews MJ Denis once more, discussing how the betrayed spouse can help soothe themselves when the wayward spouse won't get help of their own.

, 8 months 3 weeks ago
affair recovery-survivors blog-lynn-questions of a betrayed spouse-i believed forgiveness was the same as reconciliation-its not

I'm not the one who cheated,
why do I feel so ashamed?
Am I going crazy?
Why is this so hard for me?
Is healing actually possible?
Is forgiveness what I think it is?
What's normal when it comes to sex?

As I began to wrap my head around the betrayal in my marriage, I was bombarded with...

, 8 months 3 weeks ago

MJ Denis returns to the studio to discuss sexual trauma, infidelity, and her upcoming session at Hope Rising 2019.

, 9 months 1 day ago

Samuel interviews an adult child of a wayward spouse who shares her personal journey of healing and restoration.

, 9 months 3 days ago

Samuel shares insight into five ways to measure the effectiveness of your own personal healing.

, 9 months 1 week ago

Samuel has a heart to heart talk with those in crisis due to infidelity about their own healing and restoration.

, 9 months 1 week ago

Samuel uncovers the truth behind why the unfaithful spouse resorts to blaming their spouse or partner for their affair.

, 9 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel addresses a significant pitfall couples fall into when trying to recover from infidelity.

, 9 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel answers a viewers question about respect and the repair process.

, 9 months 2 weeks ago
affair recovery-survivors Blog-Christine-Our-Brain-Can-Change-for-the-Better

I've been reading about something called 'neural plasticity' in Emily Nagoski's book, Come As You Are – a book often recommended by Rick to learn about women's sexuality. In the midst of this seemingly endless period of 'recovery,' I really needed to read something positive and hopeful and validating.

How could a book discussing...

, 9 months 3 weeks ago
affair recovery-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Ruins-monuments like this have to exist to protect us from further devastation

This past month, I had the opportunity to take a two-week trip traveling through Germany, Poland, Austria, the Alps, and the Czech Republic with my oldest daughter. Although I have journeyed to three of the other continents, I had never been to Europe. It was an educational trip, full of history about Jewish culture, the Nazi regime, and World War II. Growing up, I had an appreciation for history but never had great teachers on the subject. Because of this, I left for the trip excited, yet...

, 9 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel answers a viewer's question about making it up to the betrayed spouse.

, 9 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel shares more insight into why the unfaithful spouse must forgive themselves if they are going to heal.

, 9 months 4 weeks ago

Samuel shares the battle unfaithful spouses must work through towards self compassion.

, 10 months 1 day ago

Samuel discusses some of the most common pitfalls and cop outs spouses use when trying to heal.

, 10 months 2 days ago
affair recovery-survivors Blog-Christine-How-Will-You-Spend-Your-Time-time does not heal all wounds

"For what it's worth: it's never too late to be who you want to be. I hope you live a life you're proud of, and if you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start over."
– Eric Roth

Three years can sometimes seem like three thousand years, and at other times, it...

, 10 months 6 days ago

Samuel shares a key viewpoint which is essential for couples to heal from infidelity or addiction.

, 10 months 1 week ago

Samuel gets personal today and shares how he handled the loneliness that infidelity created for him.

, 10 months 1 week ago

Samuel shares one of the most important tips to help couples in crisis heal.

, 10 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel shares four key points to help betrayed spouses reconnect with their unfaithful spouse.

, 10 months 2 weeks ago
affair recovery - survivors blog - christine - what was real

Last blog I posed a thought life challenge I've heard many betrayed express. Was my life 'real'? I don't know what to believe. What was real and what wasn't? To say that my life had not been what I thought it was would be quite an understatement. Real in every way to me, yet I was in fact controlled via the withholding of vital information to believe I was safe and in the gentle care of a loving, faithful spouse.

I won't pretend to say my thoughts on this are true for anyone but myself, but you may find threads of similarity with my feelings....

, 10 months 2 weeks ago
affair recovery-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Grief-in-Recovery-my hope is that we can all find a way to be more tender in our grief

For the unfaithful spouse, there will come a point in your recovery where you will begin your grief process. It will likely not happen at the same time or in the same way as your spouse, and it should not come as a surprise to us.

Grief is the vehicle in which we carry our pain. For betrayed spouses, grief begins immediately; they are bombarded and overwhelmed by the shock waves of finding out that their spouse has cheated on them. They are in horrendous pain, and the grief...

, 10 months 2 weeks ago

Samuel shares four key points that the unfaithful can utilize to win back their betrayed spouse's heart.

, 10 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel helps both spouses understand the need to survive before they can move on to the next season of repair work.

, 10 months 3 weeks ago
affair recovery-survivors blog-elizabeth-when it seems like everything has changed

When it comes to God, one of the most beautiful things about Him is also what I find most fascinating about Him --- He simply won't change. He doesn't budge and He is who He says He is. Yesterday, today, forever.

God does not keep office hours or change His mind on a matter. He won't get bored and He sure isn't fickle. His compassion will never end. He will never tire of hearing or listening to our broken hearts.

For all of us trying to sort out the...

, 10 months 3 weeks ago

Samuel discusses how to prioritize our own individual healing while discussing a major struggle couples in recovery face.

, 10 months 4 weeks ago

Today Samuel shares five keys to personal and marital recovery work.

, 11 months 15 hours ago
text here

How did you have the good fortune to come across Affair Recovery?

I found AR while I scoured the internet for help. Post D-day, I did what I have always done when there is a crisis in my family---research.

To be fair, first I cried.

I cried and cried and cried. I simply could not believe my husband could do such a thing; the person who was one half of the golden couple of our college. One half of the couple all our friends envied. The guy our female friends called such a wonderful husband. "He's so affectionate. He washes dishes! He is so nice to us. He likes all...

, 11 months 3 days ago
affairrecovery-survivors blog-elizabeth-why it is imperative to reach full disclosure

Today I am going to share the biggest mistake that I made since my last affair, and how it almost cost me everything. It was, in my opinion, even worse than my infidelity. That mistake was my inability to reach full disclosure the first time. For six weeks, I held on to secrets about my behavior and I continued to lie about what I had done.

Our world started crumbling down on our wedding anniversary two years ago. Every single detail of the disclosure process is awful, but it really...