Welcome

As past participants, we want our walks through infidelity to bring hope, inspiration, and courage to your own journey.
, 2 years 1 month ago

Samuel shares more of his own story and how rushing Samantha never worked.

, 2 years 1 month ago

Samuel answers a viewers question about still communicating with an affair partner after the affair is over.

, 2 years 1 month ago

Samuel shares a key recovery tool for his own healing and a relapse prevention tool.

, 2 years 1 month ago

Samuel answers a viewers question and shares insight into when it's time to focus on your own recovery

, 2 years 1 month ago

Samuel discusses trying to control our spouse's reactions to infidelity and repair work.

, 2 years 2 months ago
affairrecovery-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Roots-Part-2-the stories that remain untold are the ones that remain a stronghold

The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful,
A puzzle that no one can figure out.
But I, God, search the heart and examine the mind.
I get to the heart of the human.
I get to the root of things.
I treat them as they really are,
Not as they pretend to be.
Jeremiah 17:9-10

Remember those shallow roots we are developing?...

, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel uses a well known parable to illustrate what it takes to heal from betrayal.

, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel shares a hopeful message of how to not give up on your own healing.

, 2 years 2 months ago
affairrecovery-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Roots-Pt-1-keep pursuing the endeavors that will deepen your roots

But blessed is the one who trusts in Me alone;
the Eternal will be his confidence.
He is like a tree planted by water,
sending out its roots beside the stream.
It does not fear the heat or even drought.
Its leaves stay green and its fruit is dependable, no matter what it faces.
Jeremiah 17:7-8

My roots have been shallow. . .

...
, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel shares a pivotal mistake unfaithful spouses make in recovery work.

, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel shares insight into a common struggle for couples in recovery.

, 2 years 2 months ago
affairrecovery -survivors blog-elizabeth-be careful not to judge someones character by the pain they are in--Why-the-Unfaithful-Fears-the-Betrayed

To betrayed spouses everywhere: other than the obvious apology that is owed to you for the injustice thrown upon you due to infidelity, I have yet another confession to offer to you.

I am embarrassed to say how deep my fears, insecurities and shame have reached. For much of my recovery (for most of the first year anyway), I have been afraid of you. I have feared your pain, your emotion, your comments and your rawness of emotion. I know...

, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel discusses what happens when betrayed spouses consider forgiving their spouse too early in recovery.

, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel shares insight into how both spouses can heal after infidelity.

, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel shares pivotal insight surrounding the need for the right process in recovering from infidelity.

, 2 years 2 months ago

Samuel discusses denial and it's effects upon those in crisis.

, 2 years 3 months ago
affair recovery-survivors blog-chase-ramblings-if i am to sruvive, then i have to keep facing the darkness head on, and refuse to succumb to the temptation to try and sweep it away

Two years ago, I had my first d day. Wow, how my life has changed since. I find myself fighting darkness again lately. Perhaps it's the anniversary, perhaps its fatigue, perhaps it's a little bit of a lot of things… so I write to clear my head. This blog is simply the ramblings of a betrayed man in the weeds.

We recently moved. Some events in my working life late last year instigated a domino effect that resulted in my...

, 2 years 3 months ago
survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Sadness-one of the things i have found to be true about the walk of recovery from infidelity, is the longer i walk, the less i know. and the less i know, the more i feel.

One of the things I have found to be true about the walk of recovery from infidelity, is the longer I walk, the less I know. And the less I know, the more I feel.

The feeling that has overwhelmed me of late is one of pretty intense sadness. It seems I feel sorrow in every bone and fiber within me. I feel it deeply, and it feels like a dam around my heart that can break loose at any moment. When I look at my...

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel shares the truth behind the statement: if you loved me you would have never cheated on me.

, 2 years 3 months ago
survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Thoughts-on-Marriage-what i actually needed was for someone to tell me that it hurt because it mattered

Today I wanted to share something that happened in my office that was incredibly moving to me. At work, we get to see people of all ages and ailments. Whatever your profession is, have you ever had a moment when someone walks in your door and you quickly realize (even though you are the so called professional) that you are the one about to learn?

This morning, that was me. An 84 year old woman I had been helping came in. Her daughter usually drives her, because she...

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel shares what remorse sounds and looks like for those in crisis.

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel discusses misunderstanding, defensiveness and accusation.

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel helps those who feel stuck in their recovery.

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel shares personal insight on how to heal from the humiliation spouses feel from infidelity.

, 2 years 3 months ago

When I hear the words liar or cheater, I get a yucky and icky feeling in my stomach. I do not have the strength to face the realization that all of us are broken, without also knowing all people are able to choose humility and redemption. If I don't accept the possibility for change and repentance, I will drown in a spiral of shame.

It is hard to look back on my life and admit or pinpoint when I started telling lies instead of the truth. Like water is to a fish, it is something I have always lived with. That might sound strange to some, but perhaps a better way to explain would be to say that I have...

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel answers a viewers question about when it's better to walk away from your spouse.

, 2 years 3 months ago
waiting involves that we participate and engage-survivors Blog-Elizabeth-Waiting

Chances are if you are reading this, you are waiting for something. I remember early on in our recovery from my infidelity, it seemed that I was waiting mostly for some sort of relief from the circumstances I had created. I was lost in a complete shame spiral, and I wanted relief! I wanted the pain to go away. I have to admit now, I also was so ready for my husband to not be in pain anymore. I humbly can't even say I was healthy enough that I wanted healing for us. I only wanted relief.

When we first...

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel discusses what it means to lose yourself while doing repair work.

, 2 years 3 months ago

Samuel answers a viewers question about what to do when their betrayed spouse won't get help.

, 2 years 4 months ago
dear unfaithful keep working hard - survivors blog - elizabeth - letter to the unfaithful

If you are reading this and your affair has been discovered, chances are you don't know where to turn, where to go, or have any idea what will come of your life.

You might feel like your life is over. Humiliation probably doesn't begin to scratch the surface of what you are feeling. You are now exposed for who you really are. You are a cheater. You are a liar. And you are a sham. There is nowhere to hide and it is time to face what you have done. You probably don't like what you see in the mirror...

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