Private Messaging Basics

Affair Recovery is now taking community to the next level with adding Private Messaging “PM” functionality. Everything you need to know about private messaging at Affair Recovery is laid out for you below.

Sending a message:

1. Click on Private messages in the menu on the left-hand side of the screen from your dashboard.

2. Next click the yellow “write new message” button.

3. Enter the Username(s) of the person or persons you would like to send a private message.
*Only allows same gender
4. Enter a Subject and a Message in the appropriate fields and click send message!


If you are in a community forum or group page you can send a Private Message to the author of that message by clicking Send PM or Send Message next to the author's username. Then follow steps 2-4 above. 

Note: "Group messages" are made by entering multiple usernames in the "To" field separated by commas. 

Message Rules:

  1. Do not message the opposite gender. Messages to the opposite gender are not allowed due to the nature of the site in order to protect you and your recovery.
  2. Do not give advice; only say what's worked for you.
  3. Respect others and their time.  If you fail to be respectful you will be reported and removed from Private Messaging all together.


Blocking & Reporting users:

  1. Users can block other users messages via the “block” link found on messages.
  2. Users can report other users to Admin via the “report user” link found on messages.


You can enable or disable Private Messaging as well as enable or disable e-mail notifications.

  1. Click on settings in the top right-hand corner of your screen.
  2. Click on the “Edit Account” tab.
  3. Scroll down to Private Messages and check or uncheck the boxes according to your preference.

Add New Comment:


Cell Phone

I was an unfaithful spouse to my partner and I am trying to do recovery work.

The issue was brought about by my cell and a tendency to put my cell phone away or down when she comes around

I'll be honest I don't think about my cell phone after the affair in the same manner, but how I handling it still has impacts on her and I need to do better and resolving this matter.

I use to be on my phone a lot now unless it's a work call I am not on my phone very much and I generally leave it somewhere unless I need it.

My habit is to stop what I am doing on the phone to acknowledge when she comes in the room unless I am on a call, but she sees it as me trying to hide something, because in her mind because I put the phone away I must be up to something ie where there is smoke there is fire.

She sees me still continuing the same pattern and not resolving the issue and I'll be honest I am not sure if this the trauma or I am just missing it so I need to be coached.

What type of affair was it?

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