This may seem like a strange question, but after trust is broken through the acts of infidelity, it has been hard for me to feel love for him like I used to. We've been married 30 years and as I'm sure you've heard hundreds of times, I never thought that he could do this to me and to our marriage. He said he took the risk because he never thought I'd find out, otherwise it is unimaginable that he would risk losing everything we had built over the last 30 years. He's doing back flips trying to reconcile and recover, but I'm just afraid it's gone for me. It's been 14 months since D-day. We've attended EMS weekend, I've done Harboring Hope, we are in Married for Life, and we are going to marriage counseling. I don't know what "love" looked like to him, but breaking your marriage vows doesn't seem like love to me. Even though he is trying to become the man I always thought he was, I just can't get past seeing him through the lens of adultery. Who is this man I thought I married?