The Lie We Tell Ourselves

Many times we tell ourselves lies to convince ourselves that we're fine and that we can handle a problem. But as Rick often says, 'If you can't accept where you're at, you'll never get to where you want to go'.

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The Lie We Tell Ourselves

Lynn, *Thank You* for telling your story...again. It validates my experience.

We had that elephant in our house, too - for 18 1/2 years. It was there so long that it 'earned' a Ph.D...piled so high and deep that it spilled into every other area of our lives.

While I'm so sorry that you had to go through this, I'm thankful for your willingness to share. It is hard to not compare, especially since the rest of my Harboring Hope group is dealing with *one* physical woman. There are times when I wish there was just ONE woman with which to contend. My husband spent so much time in the arms of pornographic women - myriad of them - that he tells me, "Sorry, but I really don't have any memories of you." Seriously??

We've been 'mucking out' the house for almost two years now. It's been a long, slow, and very painful process. Your coupling of "love rejoices..." And "truth will set you free" was comforting. This has been the most painful journey of my life. It's encouraging to know that good will come from it.

Sadly, he continues to tell me, "I know I should feel bad for the pain I've caused you...but I don't. I don't know if I want you." Yes, he's in recovery and talks to a counselor weekly.

On the other hand, thanks to the healing I've received through Harboring Hope, as well as Danny Silk's book, "Keep Your Love On," I've grown and changed a lot. Fear kept me looking the other way and acquiescing to hubby's narcissistic tendencies. Who knows how this will end? Nevertheless, knowing the truth is indeed setting me free.

I LOVE this blog. Every post brings greater clarity to my situation. Thanks again for sharing.

\o/

validating your experience

Thank you for taking the time to comment. I am so grateful that you are finding help and hope here!

Here's to you for being faithFULL as you do the work of recovery. I'm so glad you are in a Harboring Hope group - I don't know how I would have made it without everything I learned and the tools that class put in my hands!

I am praying for you and for your husband - that he will reject the fantasy world of pornography and embrace real life. It takes courage to have real relationships with real people. I pray that courage will rise up from deep in his heart!

I am truly sorry for the painful words you have heard and how you have suffered. So glad you are experiencing freedom!
lmc

That was TRUE Lynn and I rejoice

Thank you so much for the clarity and sincerity of your message. It was spot on and had many jewels of wisdom!!

Jewels

Ah - thank you so much much! I'm glad you can rejoice and appreciate the comment.

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