Sadly, after nearly a year since D-Day, I am giving up. My husband expressed all kinds of remorse in the beginning, crying and begging for forgiveness. We've been seeing a counselor for 11 months and are farther apart than ever. I don't seem to have it in me to live with his cheating and lies. I know he has communication issues - always has. He is a conflict avoider, and went as far as another woman to avoid confiding in me. He will show signs of improvement and then go back to his old ways of keeping everything inside. He is a good man, a good father and a good provider. He just can't get outside of his own head. He stopped his affair long before I ever found out about it, hoping it would remain a secret. He claims to have been using her physically as an escape and never cared about her. I don't believe him, and have a hard time believing anything he says anymore. I wish this could be different. We have two adult kids that will be devastated. I think maybe if we had met with a different counselor things would be different. I'm sad, hurt and lost. i think he is too, but I will never be certain what he feels because he is so locked up. I'm also disappointed in myself because I really thought we would work this out. I'm not sure how to cope with all this sadness.